Adoption-The Change for You and Your Family Members ...

With an aging population, who are making the choice to have children later in life, the number of adoptions and people seeking adoptions are on the rise. The one issue that is hard to predict and understand, is how an adoption will affect you and loved ones in your life.

March 1, 2012 by Caroline In Category Adoption

Source: Fotolia ? Thomas Perkins

There are so many factors and unknowns that go into adoption. Depending on the type of adoption you are looking into this can become all the more complicated. Are you considering adopting a younger or older child? a special needs child? or a child from another country? The more complicating factors you add, the harder it can be.

When you are looking at adoption, one of the factors you need to consider is how other family members that are involved on a regular basis will be affected. This is even more so when you are talking about adopting an older child or a child that comes with significant challenges. If you have other children in the home, extended family or are going to be relying on family to assist in the care of the child you need to be sure to consult with those family members as well.

Children from Abroad

If you are looking at adopting a child from another country this can be quite a challenge, especially if you have other children at home. Many of the children from war torn countries are going to arrive with many barriers, language on being one of them. The entire situation is going to be foreign and scary, for both child and adult. Many of these children have witnessed horrors we can not even imagine. Most of these children are being put up for adoption because one or both parents have died or are simply too ill to be able to care for them. These children are leaving their country, one or both parents, siblings friends and familiar customs and coming to a new country where everything looks, feels, smells and is all together different. This can have serious implications to many other members of your family as everyone has to adjust.

Children With Special Needs

Adopting a child with special needs can often be one of the most rewarding feelings. Being able to offer a home to a child who faces daily challenges is an amazing possibility. It does, though, add a strain on the dynamic of the family. There are many different levels of special needs, from developmental delays, physical impairments to very high needs issues. When you encounter a combination of both, the child?s capacity can be much diminished. Making the level commitment and time much greater, be sure that your partner and you both spend a great deal of time researching what that means for both of you and any children you have.

Older Children

When you are adopting an older child, you are usually going to be dealing with a child that was in the foster care system. These children are children who have been hurt, seen terrible situations and have built walls. They often are scared and angry as a result of their experiences. It is harder for them to trust and because they are not feeling secure they are more likely to act out. These children require the highest level of emotional security a child can need. This can be draining and testing to a family. If this is a consideration that you are looking into, be sure to look around at what sort of pre-adoption counseling is available in your area.

This is not to say that adopting a baby or very young child is not challenging. It is,? just with a baby or young child that the adjustments are more like those you find when you have a baby biologically.

So What Sort of Changes Should you Expect with an Adoption?

Emotional: It is going to be an emotional roller coaster for not only the parents, but any siblings and close relatives that are involved.

Physical: It will be an adjustment in the home, more people, less space. In the case of a husband and wife, at the start there will be less intimacy as the changes can cut into that time. With other children they will feel less psychologically stable as there is another person garnering attention too.

The important factors to make sure you consider are; are you emotionally and physically ready? Your marriage needs to be stable, a new addition will not make it better, and if anything it will test it. Make sure you have the space, money and time. These resources are tested to the maximum in any adoption situation.

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Source: http://www.femguide.com/adoption-the-change-for-you-and-your-family-members-2_24378

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